“I’ve got major problems. My girlfriend got in my Instagram DMs and found a message from a girl in my class. I tried to tell her it was nothing, but the girl kept sending me messages over and over, saying: ‘Where are you?’, ‘Where are you?’ That’s because I owe her money. Because I asked her to bring me back some cigarettes from Japan. But I couldn’t tell my girlfriend that. Because she thinks I quit smoking two months ago. But now she thinks I’m cheating. And she’s pissed. So I’m hiding over here, having a cigarette.” (Hong Kong)
Modern augury: Sociology is mentioned in a college lecture. You interject, “isn’t that that cult that Tom Cruise is in where they dress up like ship’s captains?” You derive divinatory meaning from how many people start yelling at you.
